Successful people often asks others "Are you in control of your life"
What I always thought it means, that I am the one who gives orders.
SO, I used to work hard, learned how to say NO and resist when S*** falls down so I don`t slide with it! It`s not easy to control every elements of your life. And when you finally manage to get a hold of everything you realise that you are so exhausted from being a control freak and even if you built a great life you will never fully enjoy the benefits of it because you just can`t relax anymore. Mainly because you can`t let go of control. I used to call it "Work hard, play hard" or "Hassle"
Years passed by and being burned out was a pride sign of a hard working woman. And here I was exhausted, never rested, always working, available 24/7 and similar to going to the gym for a hard workout and feeling the muscle pain the next day, being constantly tired and living on coffee was the game of "No pain, No gain"
Until One day! - This sounds good! But it wasn't an exact day. It was a serious of "Shit Storms" that hit the fan and against all my effort the clouds and the lightening took over my sky. The one I was in control of. My world, my life.
Most people crumble on those rainy days and break down. The one thing I am definitely proud to say is that I wasn't one of them.
There is a saying : Life is not about surviving the storm but learning how to dance in the rain.
So I danced. Actually I twerked :-) haha
Now.... not from day one. It`s a a process not a turning point. I remember reading Gabrielle Bernstein - Superattractor book
On my way to my 9 - 5 job like a good working bee. Feeling overworked and undervalued and definitely humiliated deep inside by others who tent to be more powerful in the business life. Welcome to the corporate world they say! YEAH right... Highly recommend the book to anyone who want`s to get a hold of their life and learn how the universe will give when you don`t ask. It was a shocking and hard experience to try applying those rules to my life because it went against all the beliefs I lived by all my life. Let go and it will come.... What? When all you know is - hard work pays off. The amount of times I caught myself saying F*OFF in my head to my own voice, shutting it up when saying it`s not gonna work, it`s impossible.
Here is my takeover from applying the "Secret rules of the universe" to my life. Which helped me to understand what is being in control of your life really means.
Don`t shut down the voice in your head, don`t even try to fight with it . Learn to live with the side of yours who is negative and sceptic. It`s still you. It`s time to make peace with the part of you that you don`t even like. First and most important step for self acceptance and self love. Trust me it will also help you accept other people in your life.
When you think you let things go.... you have so much more to let go trust me. And those will be the heavy stuff. Like Kleenex time stuff.
Letting go doesn't mean you don`t care, It mean you accept the outcome whether is positive or negative. This may sound easy but if you come to this crossroad you will realise that this is deep s***.
There is no such thing anymore that "Shit Happens" just lessons learned and happened for a reason.
Treat people the way you wanna be treated in the same situation. Very important: Even when they don`t treat you that way. Don`t let the circumstances define you. Only you decide who you are, and who you are is what you do.
Do and don`t think. I had a blog about this in this site. Hesitation and overthinking kills more million dollar ideas than failure.
DONE is always, and cannot stress this enough. ALWAYS better than perfect. Perfect is a perception, and like that is individual. You can`t make everyone happy, you are not PIZZA.
Being in control means to me now that whatever happens, whatever life throw at me I assess it in the following ways:
- What can I learn from it.
- What is it trying to show me.
- What skill I have that I can master in this situation.
- How can I still make this fun! - this is my favourite piece. I love it the most, because if you don`t enjoy life in every give moment.... you my friend might be already dead while still exist.
So go out there and LIVE it! Live it bold and crazy, Don`t think but do...
Focus on what you feel, not what you know.
Stop playing safe and go experience the world.
Being free from your own mind and perceptions is more liberating that you can ever imagine it.
Before packing your backpack and taking the first plain to anywhere for an adventure, just remember happiness is an inside job. There are so much to do in your current life that can fulfil your happiness. Think outside the BOX... What if I tell you there is no box at all. You can play your role in society in any ways. You will make impact regardless. So make it positive and inspiring. The question is are you playing by the rules or can you play around the rules?
Your positive inner voice....